The 23 Incident of 2014 – Our Tipsy Weigh-in
Yesterday, we re-blogged the post “23 Things To Do Instead of Getting Engaged at 23”, because we all enjoyed the post. Since the re-blog I have read several articles responding to the original post. Siting causes such as: bad advice, dissing marriage, and being closed-minded, several bloggers have come out in retaliation against the “23 Things” article. One of these articles “24 Things To Do Instead of Getting Engaged at 24: A Response” has several valid points, and I’m not going to lie, I like her list better. The thing I found most interesting while reading all of these articles is how opinionated people are about how to eat Nutella.
Seeing as that all of us Tipsy Bridesmaids are waving at both 23 and 24 in our rear view mirrors and are most definitely all single, we all spend a significant amount of time feeling jaded by the amount of weddings we are invited to attend and the never ending Facebook feed of engagement announcements. It does seem like the number of young 20-somethings getting married is increasing, even though the national average age for getting married is higher now than it has ever been. This is not a bad thing. I know plenty of people who got married in their early 20’s and they are still happily married. The biggest fault in Wander Onwards’s post is that she blatantly says there is something wrong with the people choosing to get married young, and this is something I certainly don’t agree with. Marriage is a personal choice, and only you can know when you’re ready for that step. However, since I am nowhere near that step I have frequently told my friends that they are crazy, but I know that I think this because I am in a different place in my life than they are. I absolutely do not think there is something wrong with them or their decision.
So why did we love the post even though we disagree with several things that it said? Well, she does have one crucially valid point. Because we live in a time where every move a person makes is recorded in detail for the world to see it is easy to fall into the ‘everyone else is doing it’ mindset. When it comes to everyone around you getting married it is also super easy to start asking, “What is wrong with me?” The answer, and the point I believe the “23 Things” post was trying to make is that there is nothing wrong with you. Just because it seems like the whole world is getting married doesn’t mean that you also have to get married. Take it from someone who understands completely how you feel. I tell my friends on a regular basis that there must be something wrong with me because the last time I got asked out we had a different president, but I also know that I am just wanting what I don’t have, even though now is not the right time for me. This is the reason I loved that Wander Onwards wrote her post. While she may have not presented it in the best way, addressing the idea that it is okay to be single in your early, mid, or even late 20s (heck I will probably still be single in my 30s).
I’m not going to make you a list of things you could do instead of getting married. Honestly, both of the lists I mentioned here seem more like bucket lists than things to do in your early 20s, and if you want to see my bucket list you can check it out on our other blog: The Tipsy Geekette in a post where I do tell you to make a bucket list instead of New Year’s Resolutions. I am going to tell you that if you are young, single, and stressed because everyone around you got engaged yesterday you need to stop stressing out. If lists help you, make a list of things to do. If you need inspiration check out either one of the aforementioned lists. I personally, don’t ever plan to hang out in front of a window naked or sign up for CrossFit, but if that is your thing and it will keep you from feeling stressed about your relationship status, then by all means do it. I will leave you with a piece of advice from my very wise mother: Just live your life, enjoy what you love, and everything will fall into place.