28 Things I Know at 28
Today is my 28th birthday. Surprisingly, it wasn’t until a week ago that I actually started feeling anxious about turning another year older. I’m no longer feeling anxious, but give me a day or two and I’m sure I’ll have another mini life crisis, because isn’t that what you’re supposed to do in your twenties? That question actually brings me to a point I want to make before we begin. 28 Things I Know at 28 is not one of those “Things you should do by the time you are [fill in the blank] age” posts, because I am not really in any way qualified to give anyone advice on how to be a successful 28 year-old.
Sure, I have a full time job with benefits, pay my bills on time (mostly – but it is not my fault that I can’t pay my car payment online), and live in my own apartment, but I still call my mom and cry about stupid crap, have no working knowledge of the city of Dallas garbage pick up schedule (that’s actually a really specific example that involves a box spring and a lot of nagging…it’s for another time), and am still on my parent’s family cell phone plan. However, I maintain that if I wasn’t on my parent’s family plan then neither of them would know what to do with it so really I’m doing them a favor. My point is that while I may be a functioning adult I am not really qualified to tell anyone else what their life should look like at this age, so I’m not going to do that. This list is just a list of things that I know or have learned (mostly about myself) over the last 28 years.
Note: If you want advice, I will be happy to give it to you, but you have to ask.
28 Things I Know (or have learned) at 28
I know that:
- It is a good idea to buy multiple bottles of hand soap at a time. – It is a truth universally acknowledged in my apartment that I will inevitably run out of hand soap at the most inconvenient time. Thus, I have taken to buying hand soap in bulk.
- My clothes drying rack might just be the best thing I own. – My mom got me a hanging drying rack a few years ago at Christmas and at first I was like, “Ummm…what is this for”, and genuinely did not think I would ever use it. How wrong I was. I use it every time I do laundry and also even when I have nothing to dry. My phone really likes to hang out on the drying rack and when it is there I always know where it is.
- If I’m at the store wondering if I should buy more bobby pins, the answer is yes. – I have a lot of hair and everyday I attempt to coax it into something resembling presentable with bobby pins. However, bobby pins have a life of their own and they like to run away. Therefore, I am always needing to buy bobby pins…always.
- There is no difference between male and female razors. That being said, I like when mine are various shades of purple. – I will say that there is definitely a difference between name brand and off brand razors, but the only difference in “gender” is the packaging. I do prefer fun colors on my razors, but honestly I’m good with anything that will rid my legs of hair without making them look like they just survived a fight with barbed wire.
- Moisturizer is a god send. – Every time I get out of the shower I feel like Cassandra on Doctor Who. My skin is basically screaming, “Moisturize me”.
- Having a jar of coconut oil around is probably a good idea. – Let me put it this way, if I was stranded on an island and could only take three things one of those things would be a jar of coconut oil. It has so many uses, so many in fact, that I’m pretty sure you can probably use coconut oil to hail a rescue ship. And, I know some of you are probably thinking that if I get stranded on an island there would probably be coconuts, but that is just too much work. I will need to exert my energy towards trying to find a salt-free water supply and keeping myself from dying of a sunburn.
- It is 100% okay to have a therapist. – Well this just got serious, but really this is something that took me a long time to figure out, and getting a therapist was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself.
- Sunscreen is always a good idea. – I have two shades: paste and lobster. If someone asks me if I need sunscreen I pull a Snape and say, “Always”.
- The unfollow button on Facebook is the best thing to happen to the internet since Facebook. – Look people are sometimes annoying. I’m not saying that to be a pessimist, or even to call out other people because I know that I am sometimes annoying. This is why the unfollow button is genius. Just because someone posts a bunch of crap that makes you lose faith in humanity doesn’t mean you want to be so mean as to unfriend them. You can simply hide all of the ridiculous crap they are posting.
- My mother is, was, and always will be right. – Yeah, this pained me to write, but it’s so so very true.
- If offered a cupcake, I will eat a cupcake. – Life is short, okay.
- Tap dancing in Target will make people stare at me. – Still doesn’t stop me from doing it though. I tap dance in while ordering food in the cafeteria at work too. No shame.
- I will never be Taylor Swift. – Not that I ever thought I was going to be a famous musician because I certainly did not, but I think I may need to resign myself to the fact that I won’t ever be able to make “cat lady” look as cool as Taylor Swift does. I fully plan on being one of those weird people that has 100 pets one day but my apartment is a pet free zone so that dream will have to wait.
- The best cure for a cold is chicken noodle soup and Harry Potter. – Hands down, this always does the trick. Those movies are magic, you know.
- Sleep in precious. – I don’t sleep a lot during the week. I am very much a night person and I very much work a job that starts in the morning so there are nights that I don’t go to sleep until like 2 am, but those 5 hours of sleep are Gollum levels of precious.
- Spinach is a horrible abomination sent to Earth as an advance attack from a race of aliens who fully intend to take over the world. – This is just a fact that the rest of the world refuses to accept.
- There is never a reason to let vacation days go unused. – My first year working at the company I currently work for I almost let my vacation reset without using all of my vacation days (which I would have lost, they don’t roll over) and my boss at the time gave me the single best piece of advice I’ve probably ever gotten. She simply told me that letting my vacation days go was stupid and then practically told me she didn’t want to talk to me until I’d requested some days off. Now, you couldn’t pay me to waste a vacation day.
- When writers block strikes it is probably because I need a new notebook. – I’m still trying to run some scientific experiments to prove this, but in my heart I know it is true and my head needs it to be true so as to justify the insane amount of blank notebooks I own and continue to purchase every year.
- True friends will always have a margarita waiting when you text them that you are “fine”. – This is just a sisterhood thing, isn’t it? Girl code, right?
- Tex-Mex is a food group. – The Government’s Food Pyramid is wrong. Tex Mex is definitely it’s own category and necessary to living a happy, fulfilled life.
- I can quote the entirety of Mean Girls, Ever After, Steel Magnolias, and Clueless. – This may make me #Basic, but I don’t care. Those movies are AMAZING and I will keep making my way through life one “Here slap Ouiser” and “You Go Glen Co Co” at a time.
- Water is delicious…so is wine. – One you need to survive, the other you need to thrive.
- Hugs from my nieces are the most wonderful thing in the world. – I am not a hugger and neither are my nieces, but the hugs I love getting the most are the hugs that I get from them.
- It is okay to be 28 and still single. – I put this on here because I know that it is true. I did not put this on here because I’ve come to terms with it. For anyone who is attending happy hour with me soon, don’t worry I’ll still be complaining about being 28 and single (mostly because I don’t have a man to complain about like the rest of you).
- Nobody will ever make me feel bad for binge watching Netflix or taking a three hour nap. – I used to let people get to me when they were shocked when I told them that I’d recently watched all three seasons of Felicity in a week or taken a 3-5 hour nap on a Sunday, but not any more. Unless I have a commitment, my time is my time and I’ll do what I please with it. That also means I’ll probably eat some cake too!
- If I laugh about it later, it was probably worth it. – Was it a good idea to get super drunk and dance on stage at a dive bar in Austin on my 22nd birthday? Probably not. Do the pictures from that night make me die laughing? Definitely.
- I am weird and that is completely okay. – Yeah there is no way around this one. I have so many interests and random thoughts that I just can’t help being weird. But, isn’t everyone a little weird. Wow, this is starting to sound like a very progressive after school special about acceptance.
- I still have a lot to learn. – If you asked 18 year old me what I would be doing when I was 28 I probably would have said winning my fourth Tony Award or running a creative company, but neither of those things are currently happening. That isn’t because I can’t do those things but because I’m only 28. Eighteen year old Michelle may have thought she would have everything figured out by 28, but twenty-eight year old Michelle knows that she probably won’t ever have everything figured out and that it’s the figuring things out that makes life interesting.
What life nuggets have you learned?